And I knew that the church would be filled so I started out this way:
Our Mother would have been so happy to see so many of her family and friends here for her today. She obviously cut a wide swath and touched many, many lives.
Mom was born and raised in East Middlebury on August 10, 1934, although according to Mom that was up for debate. Her birth certificate states that she was born on August 8, but as a child it was always celebrated on the 10th so she believed it to be the 10th. She never really thought all that much about it and never thought to change the pattern.
Mom and Dad married in 1952 in Brandon at the Methodist Church with her sister, Barb, brother-in-law, Bob Piper, her mom, Beatrice and father, Shirley Ovitt attending. They bought their home on Pidgeon Road in the early 1950s and raised five children there: Earl, Jr., Laura, Norma, Jim, and me. It was a small home for seven people, and I believe that that was where our tight family bond and our values were formed. The house was full of noise, busy-ness, and activity but it had much love for the kids and later grandkids, and great-grandkids.
There are 12 grandchildren; Brian, Amanda, Erin, Earl III, JR, Heath, Marcel, Lance, Jennifer, Jamie, Heather, and Patience. 16 great grandchildren; Lucas, Kailey, Kara, Little Larry, Madison, Heath, Grace, Jackson, Bode, Owen, Autumn, Haidyn, Mason, Jayla, AAliyah and JJ.
Her family sustained her - it gave her immense pride when she talked about her kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids.
She loved family gatherings, birthdays, weddings, holidays. Always the first to say "what can I bring". She gave generously to the people around her with her time, friendship and love.
However, there were also kids that "adopted" mom as their mom or grandmother because of her incredible ability to touch peoples' hearts, make them feel loved, protected, and listened to. It was never out of the ordinary to see different faces at the kitchen table talking to Mom, as a matter of fact, it was unusual "not" to see one there.
Mom worked for numerous people in her life in a job she really enjoyed. Two particular families she enjoyed working for were Patti and Pete Brakeley, and Vicki and Georgie Sappio. She was more like a good family friend then anything else. They would often say "come on Kathy, let's have a soda or a cup of tea" and they'd sit - , and then she would light up a cigarette.
One story I found out about, about 10 years ago which was a gesture that summed up our Mother to a "T". Mom and I were at a memorial service for Vicki Sappio. We were sitting with Vicki's daughter, Debbie Suplee and they were talking about "back-in-the-day." Debbie turned to Mom and said "Kathy, do you remember the Thanksgiving my mom burnt the turkey", and my Mom said yeah. Debbie went on to say that our Mother brought over our Thanksgiving turkey to replace the burnt one. But knowing Mom, she probably was making two and had three in the freezer just waiting for some family function or emergency.
But that's the type of woman our Mother was - self-less, compassionate, caring, thinking of others before herself - always. Never complaining, never stopping long enough to "think about" complaining. And she was so worried about putting the burden on us kids. She's say "you kids are so busy - I'll do what I can."
One day a couple of months ago, I was out for a bike ride and thought that I would stop by to see Mom and Dad. As I was getting closer to the house, I saw Mom outside with a shovel and mounds of dirt on the lawn. I could not believe my eyes. She was digging up the kitchen sink drain-line because it was moving too slowly. She had dug one foot down, 1 foot across, and 10 feet of the 20 foot line. Here she is, 75 years old. I asked her why she didn't call one of us - she said "I can do it - I just go slow."
She never, ever wanted to depend on her kids, but truth be told, we depended on her. Her stability, her strength, her fiery independence, her humor, her common sense. We would all call her with a question or problem - Jr and Marcel about some gardening question, Amanda about the family's next get together, or Patience asking Gram to let the dog out during a time we were away.
Her love for animals equaled her love of family. Mom would donate food, money, and supplies to animals in need. One time, a young hawk was walking down our road but it could not fly, so Mom had us catch it. And for the next 2 weeks with lots of her love, and plenty of raw hamburger, the bird healed. We took him outside and let him fly away. That hawk would often come back and circle the house, and Mom would be so happy to see that bird.
Mom epitomized community, charity, love, selflessness - she lived it - she touched many, many lives.
Mom we love you, and miss you terribly. We will keep your lessons and values close, and your love closer in our hearts forever. You must be in heaven, looking down on us and smiling.
Rest peacefully now Mom; you worked hard, you played hard, and you did an incredible job with us kids.
Deb,
ReplyDeletethis is a real beautiful euology. I remember your Mom as being the coolest Mom ever. from the few times I went over to your house . I remember that all of you could tell your Mom anything and it wouldn't shock her and that she would either laugh at us or tel us what was wrong with whatever we were up to. I know how hard it is to lose a parent and whatever you need to do to get through this journey do it. It has been 12 years for my Dad and to this day I still go and have a beer with him. I will bring 2 beers and lean up against his stone and drink one and pour the other one out for him I have been doing this since day one. Cherish your memories and the memories of your Mom'S many friends. I always love hearing a story about Dad every now and then. I am here for you if you ever want to just sit and talk I know we are busy but we need to stop and smell the flowers along the way See you sometime you have been and will always be a dear friend Susie